Five questions. One result. Zero real-world utility.

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1. Your friend's been turned into a donkey, and you’ve been caught up in an awful shipwreck. Things aren’t going your way so - naturally - you hatch a plan to leave town on an adventure. Where do you go?






2. Your plan goes awry and you end up stranded on a desert island miles from anywhere, in possession of a single object. The sort of object you wouldn’t dream of leaving the house without. What is it?






3. By some ludicrous scheme, you’ve managed to escape the desert island and plan a big night out after a REALLY long week. Do you…






4. The weekend's over. Monday rolls around again and surprise, surprise: a terrible tragedy befalls a close friend or relative. Do you…






5. Despite your partying, poor judgement, terrible orientation skills, and the exceptionally unfortunate company you seem to keep, you rise to the very top of society. What sort of leader are you?